PUPO (again)!

Well, I am officially PUPO (again)!!!! This time I feel so much more relaxed. Also MUCH less excited. Almost as if I already know I failed. I know that sounds like a BAD thing, but it is easier to feel this way (I am WAY more relaxed) than to be all jittery and excited thinking it worked. Backwards thinking I realize... lol.

Here is a picture of the lucky embryo!!! Hopefully she is a sticky bean!!

Embryo #6!!! PUPO in my belly now!

Just for comparison... here is what my LAST blastocyst looked like...

FET #1... BFN... =(

As you can see the current blastocyst is not as expanded as the first one and doesn't look as good (in my opinion at least)... BUT... ya know what? That first blast didn't stick! So maybe it is a good thing that FET#2 looks nothing like FET#1. =)

So now I am PUPO and just waiting to POAS!!! Not sure when I will officially start POAS. I want to try to wait until Tuesday Feb 7th. My beta isn't until Thur Feb 9th. Which is 10 dp5dt. Maybe I can wait that long? IDK... only time will tell what happens with this attempt! 

Wish us luck!!!

The final countdown...

... has begun!!! We are T-minus 4 days in counting until the big T-day (transfer day)!!! I guess (unfortunately) I am getting excited and even a tad bit optimistic about this cycle. It kind of sucks b/c it will make for a bigger letdown if I get a BFN... but it's impossible NOT to get excited about something THIS big!!! 

I began the final "phase" of FET meds yesterday. Started the Medrol & Doxycycline pills. And the Lovenox SQ injections. And the dreaded PIO (progesterone in oil) IM injections!!! I can honestly say the build-up has been worse than the actual injections! They don't even hurt!! The only thing that sucks is how sore my bum is the next day. My husband is doing a great job at injecting the shots. I am very proud of him! 

We fly to Atlanta Sunday morning and have the evening free to ourselves! DS is staying with my parents but DH is actually joining me this time. I am kind of excited about night #1. Dinner & a movie maybe? But night #2 is going to be "light activity"... but I'll probably do bedrest just to be extra careful. Don't want another repeat of last cycle (nor the same results).

Well... more to come in the near future!!!

2 more weeks!!!

ONLY 2 WEEKS FROM TODAY UNTIL MY FET!!!

I upped my Estrace to 2 pills twice daily as of today!! Friday is the next medication increase!!! Oh yeah, and Friday is also my first lining check!! Can't wait to actually "see" what is going on down there! I keep wondering and wondering if I have developed more cysts. Sometimes I get cramps around my ovaries and I think to myself, "It is probably a cyst causing that cramping". I hope I am wrong. Fingers crossed that everything looks good on Friday!!! EEEKK!! Hopefully these next 2 weeks will FLY by as quickly as this past weekend did!

Closer and closer...

The big day is getting closer and closer!!! I cannot believe that I am a little over 2 weeks away from my FET! I might be pregnant in a few weeks!! I am SO excited!!!

I have been on Estrace now for 4 days and my dose goes up on Monday! My u/s is less than a week away!!! Anyway, no real new news to share just thought I'd post about my excitement and how close it is to D-Day!!! =)

The Date is Set!

So I spoke with my RE's nurse today and we have a transfer date!!!!!

JANUARY 30th!!!

That is the day I *might* become pregnant!!! I am SO excited! I hope the next 3 weeks fly by as quickly as possible!!!

That means my *possible* due date would be October 17th! So... I can "announce" my pregnancy around 8-9 weeks pregnant (Sometime between Feb 28th-March 13). Then I can "announce" the gender around week 16 (April 25-May 1---- Assuming it is a confirmed GIRL! lol). I cannot wait to finally get to utter those words, "It's a Girl"!!! It's something I have been hearing A LOT from friends lately, but I have never spoken. I cannot even explain the jealousy and sadness I hear every time I hear that phrase. I cannot wait for it to finally be my turn!!! I want a daughter so badly!!! I want my baby boy to have a little sister to protect and befriend! I want my family to be complete with my Sweet Prince and my Fairy Princess!!!

I start Estrace on Wednesday (Jan 11th) and my first lining check is January 20th at the local RE's office. Oh why can't time speed up? Or why can't I have a window into the future to see whether or not this is going to work (And whether or not I should get excited or prepare for the worst again?)...

Only time will tell I guess!

Ready!!!

I am so ready to get this party started!!!!

Tonight I noticed a tiny bit of spotting so I assume that AF will start in full-force tomorrow! That means I am only a few short weeks away from my second FET! OF COURSE my body would choose to start AF on a Saturday... so I won't be technically "starting my FET cycle" until next week sometime. I would say Wednesday at the EARLIEST. Maybe Thursday or Friday even. I say that b/c embryo transfers aren't performed on weekend days. And if they started the Estrace Monday or Tuesday, the ET would fall on a Saturday or Sunday. So I HOPE they start me Wednesday and don't push it back much further. That puts my ET around January 30th, 31st, or February 1st or 2nd. And that puts my EDD around October 17th-20th. Not a bad time of year for a birthday IMO.  =)

FET #2

Yes, I apologize to anyone following about not posting any sooner, but I did end up with a BFN on FET #1. I went for my beta at 9dp5dt and my HPTs were confirmed... BFN... BIG FAT NEGATIVE. It was very painful and it took some time, but I have moved on and I am ready for FET #2.

We still have 1 frozen XX normal embryo and 17 frozen eggs ready to be fertilized. So I think we are still in pretty good shape. However, some health concerns have arisen over the past few weeks that I am concerned about.

I still have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis like I posted previously, but my TSH levels aren't as low and they would like to see when someone is TTC. So my endocrinologist has upped my Synthroid dose to try to lower the TSH to a better TTC level.

Also, when I failed my first FET, my RE wanted to do some tests to see if we can pinpoint the reason for my failure. First, he had a bunch of levels drawn related to clotting. Then, (at my annual pap with my regular OB Dec 16th) he wrote orders for some cervical cultures (to check for infections), and next week (Dec. 28th) he is going to have my regular OB do an endometrial culture. The endometrial culture is not only to check for uterine infections deep in the endometrium, but also b/c he says that taking a sample irritates the lining and has been shown success in making the lining more lush and rich and better for implantation. So it is supposed to help my embryo implant.

Well, I do not have ALL of the results back yet, but I do have some of the blood work results and so far... not looking great. I have abnormal clotting levels. Indicating I do have some sort of clotting disorder. Now, I have known that I am positive for a genetic disease known as MTHFR deficiency. Dr. T didn't think this would be much of a problem for me, but now that I have 1 failure under my belt he wants to be extra cautious. Well, MTHFR might be impacting my clotting factors more than he thought b/c my clotting levels are so funky. I had some of them re-drawn to check and see if they are always abnormal, but still waiting on the results of the re-draws.

My 2nd FET begins on December 23rd when I start my Lupron (again :-/ ). Oh yeah, and Dr. T made a few changes to my protocol (trying something different in order to hopefully reach a different outcome). Instead of Crinone gel (vaginal cream progesterone), this time I am going to take PIO (progesterone in oil). This is an intramuscular injection that I will take daily at night time. I am definitely NOT looking forward to IM injections daily, and especially nervous that my husband will have to administer them (I cannot reach my own butt!), but I am happy to know that we are doing something different (I don't want another BFN!). Also, since my clotting factors are all coming back abnormal, I am going to have to take Lovenox daily as well. This is a subcutaneous injection I take daily in the belly. Again, not happy to be adding ANOTHER SQ injection (along with Lupron) daily, but prepared to suffer in order to obtain my dream.

So that means that PHASE 1 of FET#2 begins December 23rd with Lupron 10units SQ daily.

Then... I have the PHASE 1 change-up... which is the endometrial biopsy on December 28th.

Then PHASE 2 of FET#2 begins when I start my period again. (approx 2 weeks after starting Lupron) That is when I will begin Estrace pills. I will have my lining check approx 1 week before the slotted transfer date.

Then the final phase, PHASE 3 of FET#2, begins approx 5 days before transfer day. That is when I will start the (FET#2 change-up) PIO injections, (FET#2 change-up) Lovenox injections, Medrol, and Doxycycline.

Then hopefully I can wait at least 7-8 DPT to start POAS. I do not want to POAS at 6dp5dt again. I feel like it was too early. Even though it was BFN 6dp5dt AND 8dp5dt last time... I still don't want to risk testing too early. So I would LOVE to wait until my beta... but I would be happy to make it 7 or 8 days past transfer.

So there you have it!! FET#2 is quickly approaching and I am SOOOO ready for it!!!